#49

I turn 27 tomorrow. How does it feel to be 27? Should I be scared?

On my last day of being 26, I am doing this and later, when I get home, I'll read a Percy Jackson book. If I'm still awake by 11 or 12, I'll switch the channel to Nick and watch As Told by Ginger re-runs.

How should 27 be? It seems like a good number, but like 26, I have no idea how to truly live by it.

#48

I faked a smile because I didn't want you to worry. It was a white lie. I knew you'd panic if I told you both my arms were numb...that my my legs felt weak and that I had troubles breathing.

I felt that you'd cry (probably lose it) if I showed you I was about to pass out. No mother is supposed to see her child die.

I'm sorry I lied. I'm sorry I told you I was better when all I really wanted was to have someone stick a needle on my arm and make me sleep - just so I could escape the pain. Thank you for staying with me until I fell asleep.

Thank you for that kiss on the forehead that made it all go away.

#39

He started singing when he saw me. As I walked farther away from him, his voice became louder and I felt my cheeks burn. I knew he was singing for me because I see the way he looks at me every day.

Am I the same when I like someone so bad? The answer is yes - I don't even have to ask. The pieces I write are like that man's voice - they get longer and stronger while the person I like becomes more distant. I and that man, we are not showing off skills (skills that we both do not have), we are merely begging for attention.

Begged for attention.